“And whoever would be first among you must be slave of all. For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve…”
Mark 10:44-45
Serve one another in love, even when it’s uncomfortable, in season or not.
When talking about marriage, we love to talk about what strengths we can bring to a marriage. But sometimes God asks us to step out of our comfort zone and use our weaknesses. And, isn’t that the true definition of a servant… someone who is willing to serve even in awkward ways that aren’t easy?
Recently I had a major operation, rotator cuff surgery. Up until then I only visited hospitals and I took my health for granted. But a day after the August surgery I sat in a recliner, my arm in a sling and realized I couldn’t move my arm or feel my numb fingers. I felt helpless.
Enter my husband. He became my nursemaid, filling my ice (for pain) machine, doing the laundry, helping me put on my clothes, driving me places, and helping me into the shower as my balance was off. You see, when your dominant side needs to be immobile, you tend to become tipsy… and I don’t mean the drinking type of tipsy.
If you looked at my husband’s large, wide hands you’d understand his challenge to do some of the little things I needed. I mean, his hands were made to palm a basketball. He once took a vocational aptitude test and scored the lowest on becoming a cherry picker, a job which needs fine motor skills. But when I became “one-handed”, he had to do chores I couldn’t do like chopping veggies, tying my shoes or fastening my bra. But because he loves me, he was willing to serve me in ways that were out of his comfort zone.
A few years ago, I volunteered to follow behind my daughter as she drove through several states to meet her fiancée. Now I don’t like long distant driving. I become sleepy and it takes copious amounts of Mountain Dew and hot coffee to keep me on the right side of the road. But I determined I would make the trip from Michigan to Nebraska. I became creative in keeping myself awake. Passing through Michigan, Illinois, and Iowa, I rolled down the windows to feel the brisk air. I blasted the radio, and chowed down plenty of junk food so I was able to concentrate on the road. I would much rather have done something closer to home but she need me to accompany her.
Marriage is the great stretcher. As a wife, I learned to pack up boxes and move 22 times. Now I’m not the most organized person but I learned quickly that in order to have any kind of semblance of a life at the new place, I had to label and pack up each room carefully. If something like our tax return was left in a box marked “garage,” I would pay dearly when looking for the document the next April. I was forced to pay attention to minute details so as to make our family life smoother in the new house.
Serving outside of our sweet spots is painful and not always fun. But marriage is about pulling together in a team. Yes, we married one another for the strengths we admired. But God calls us to serve one another, in both our strengths and weaknesses.
Penny says
So true! What a great reminder that in our weakness Christ shines the brightest. I am sorry you had to go through such a tough time
Carol Stratton says
Good insight, Penny! Thanks for dropping by… and I am feeling better. As my physical therapist says, “This is a little period in your big life.” Good perspective, I’d say.